Report:
Two households, both alike in dignity,
In fair Beckenham, where we lay
our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood
makes civil hands unclean.Forgive the drama but never have two sides
known so much about each other nor so desperately desired a victory, a
victory that would bestow glory and honour on those who emerged
triumphant (not to mention bragging rights till after Xmas) and pour
scorn and discontent upon the hapless losers.
This was a six pointer, a game that could so easily have lifted our
spirits and set our oppo up for a season of woe and disappointment. Alas
this wasn't to be our day despite a display of somewhat different
character from the week before when we were so bad I was embarrassed to
write a report.
Arriving in dribs and drabs, noticeably less organised than the away
game in Mid Sussex and without much of a clue where our shirts were
(hats off to Leon, his alternative style of organisation will I'm sure
be a feature of your gorgeous reporters writing this season!) New Beccs
were strangely relaxed. The return of the rock upon which our
foundations are laid, or Heady as he's better known, as well as the
wunderkind Pullen seemed to buoy our confidence.
A cunning tactical switch in formation for this game and it was
working well from the outset. So well in fact that after some lovely
link up play in the middle and some dazzling work from a man who’s
twizzles are legendary throughout the land, Mr Bowley was on the end of
an exquisite ball in to the D. Taking careful aim he managed to connect
beautifully with the ball, which was a shame cos if he’d scuffed it, it
would have probably gone in.
We played the ball around nicely, earning some good opportunities and
forcing short-corners with the pressure we exerted. Jessup decided at
one point that he didn’t fancy passing to a man free in the D, and why
should he, there was a whole square 2 inches of goal for him to aim at!
It was widely agreed at half time that HSBC were there for the
taking, after not having a chance of any note during the first period.
So we went after them, players passing, running, supporting each other
it was a good spell. It even led to what some may call a bad miss, some
a tough chance while most will wonder just how I managed to put the ball
so wide from so close.
Shock horror though New Beccs decided that we’d had enough of
concentrating and gave away a short corner which we made a right hash of
defending and conceded against the run of play.
It was looking tough, a desperate situation when the chips were down
and we were heading for a second straight defeat against one of our main
rivals. But cometh the hour, cometh the man, as I’m sure a wise old
bloke once said, Heady called to the subs bench and beckoned forth the
most fearsome attacking weapon at his disposal – ME!!! Like a man
possessed I flew on to the pitch and yes you guessed it, gave the ball
away immediately. Not that a seasoned pro and psychologically stable man
worries about these petty details, I had a job to do.
Brendon drove at their defence moving in ways so mysterious it was an
almost spiritual experience to see it, I with the extra yard of pace
afforded me by my natural attacking mind made a move in to space. The
ball was slipped inside the defender, the goalkeeper bore down on me
like Goliath on David, and I with a deft strike from my stick of destiny
slid the ball calmly in to the gaping goal.
Cue ecstatic celebrations, the crowd on the sidelines going wild,
beautiful ladies swooning and lots of other stuff too.
Now that’s out of the way I might as well tell you that not much else
happened that’s worth my literary prowess getting out of bed for. It
remained 1-1 and it was honours even, we will need to pick it up if
we’re to do even as well or better than last season.
Kez, a storming game wherever you found yourself, particularly at
left back and might I say you are welcome to it!
Jessup you bloomin moomin, that was a disgraceful challenge which
richly deserved a yellow and the muppet of the match award, who do you
think you are, Jack?
Until next time faithful reader, adieu. |